The fickle stars have spoken! Read below to learn your fate, if you dare. Looks like the stars have been watching way too much CSI yet again...
ARIES (March 21-April 20)
Don't act so shocked at all your media attention. Multiple amputations are seldom associated with petting zoo mishaps.
TAURUS (April 21 - May 20)
Your feeling that you are being watched is tragically validated in later weeks as dental records confirm your jawbone's identity.
GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Suddenly, your attorney's insanity defense strategy is dealt a fatal blow. On the bright side, you've lost eight pounds during the trial!