I shouldn't be making fun of the May 21 Doomsdayers. It's never sporting to shoot fish in a barrel, or make fun of the mentally challenged.
And the May 21sters are some profoundly challenged fish in a very shallow barrel.
But I have a headache and they're easy targets, so here goes.
TOP TEN EXCUSES WHY THE WORLD DIDN'T END ON MAY 21, 2011 (For use on May 22):
1) Forgot to factor in Leap Years. Math is hard.
2) Oprah's final show doesn't air until next week.
3) Oops, wrong planet. It was Urth that was destroyed Saturday afternoon. Urth, not Earth. But man did they have it coming.
4) 2011? Wait a minute, the t-shirt shop printed it wrong. I meant 2211. Yeah. May 21, 2211. Just wait, I tell ya! Just wait!
5) It did end, right on schedule, and was immediately replaced with the back-up copy. You won't notice any difference, since the backup is is is perfect.
6) Knew the date was bogus, was just tired of Mormons getting all the media attention.
7) I just wanted my van painted.
8) It did end, but the liberal media refuses to report it.
9) Gay marriage. No, we're not sure how it relates, but we're sure it does, somehow.
10) Can we have all our stuff back?
And the May 21sters are some profoundly challenged fish in a very shallow barrel.
But I have a headache and they're easy targets, so here goes.
TOP TEN EXCUSES WHY THE WORLD DIDN'T END ON MAY 21, 2011 (For use on May 22):
1) Forgot to factor in Leap Years. Math is hard.
2) Oprah's final show doesn't air until next week.
3) Oops, wrong planet. It was Urth that was destroyed Saturday afternoon. Urth, not Earth. But man did they have it coming.
4) 2011? Wait a minute, the t-shirt shop printed it wrong. I meant 2211. Yeah. May 21, 2211. Just wait, I tell ya! Just wait!
5) It did end, right on schedule, and was immediately replaced with the back-up copy. You won't notice any difference, since the backup is is is perfect.
6) Knew the date was bogus, was just tired of Mormons getting all the media attention.
7) I just wanted my van painted.
8) It did end, but the liberal media refuses to report it.
9) Gay marriage. No, we're not sure how it relates, but we're sure it does, somehow.
10) Can we have all our stuff back?
I really hope the world doesn't end today, purely selfishly because I've got a supermarket delivery coming, and they've already got my money.
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