Sunday, September 23, 2012

Markhat Revealed, Part Two

Last week, I posed a question to you, my vast army of loyal readers. The question was this -- what actors should be chosen to portray Markhat and Darla in the rumored movie adaptation of The Broken Bell?

Yes, there is a rumor that The Broken Bell is under consideration by several top Hollywood film producers. I know, because I just started the rumor. Do your part and help spread it! Remember, loose lips sink ships. I know that's not entirely applicable in this instance, but I like saying it fast.

Your responses were swift and insightful. I'm going to list them all below, and each will be linked to a Wikipedia photo of the actor or actress named, so if you don't know the face, click and it shall be shown unto you. I won't send you to any long-loading movie or unsavory fan sites, so click without worry or undue apprehension.

Markhat:

Todd Lowe  Currently starring in HBO's True Blood. He looks tough, and a bit haunted.

Joe Manganiello - You've seen him in ER and Spiderman (the 2002 release). He could do Markhat perfectly.

Michael McMillian - He's got a younger everyman quality I like too.

Richard Armitage - May be my favorite Markhat suggestion thus far. Good-looking but can carry a smirk.


Darla:

Winona Ryder - You know Wynona! A great choice for Darla.

Ashley Judd - I admit I never thought of Ashley Judd as Darla, but now that I do think about it, yes, she could pull it off.

Sandra Bullock - Wow. Sandra Bullock would make a wonderful Darla. Her eyes and hair are perfect.

Lacey Chabert - A fellow Mississippian, born in the little town of Purvis, not far from here. She's had many roles in live-action and as a voice actress in numerous animated films as well.

Essie Davis - Australian actress with big eyes. Blonde, but hair dye technology improves every day!

Putting aside for a moment my own idea that actor Timothy Hutton should portray Markhat, I think my favorite pairing for from the lists above comes down to this --

INSERT DRUMROLL HERE

Richard Armitage as Markhat, and Winona Ryder as Darla!

We also have a suggestion for the actress best suited to play Mama Hog. Phyllis Diller would have been perfect for the role, yes, but as she is sadly passed, Cloris Leachman would be wonderful for the role. Especially shrunk down digitally, as were the actors who portrayed the Hobbits in The Lord of the Rings.

I know, I know, most of you hate that pairing. But take it up with Universal Studios; they are the ones rumored to be doing the rumored casting. I have nothing to do with it. Complain to them, in writing, and remember to send thousands of registered letters each day for at least a month.

Let me offer a very special thanks to everyone who suggested a name. That would be Maria and JWB and Merrian and Kellie and April!

I'll make sure your monickers show up in a later book, so watch for them.

Now for the big news -- in next Sunday's entry, I hope to release, for the first time anywhere, a pair of absolutely brilliant hand-drawn portrayals of Markhat, done by a real artist. No computer enhancements, either -- he does all his work strictly by hand, with pens, on paper.

I've seen the sketches already, and I'm floored. You will be too, so stop back by next Sunday!